escapingbabylon.com

(Strike one of those “elephant”s.)
I have a friend whom I’ve known since my family first moved to Georgia in 1972. Our dads worked together, and his family lived just a few houses away from mine. He was a rather energetic fellow who always made me laugh, and I always enjoyed the times when we were hanging out, even if he was getting both of us in trouble half the time. He is largely responsible for my enthusiasm for cars, and I was his first example of a Christian who applied faith to everyday life beyond Sunday mornings. In more recent years, we have laughed our respective butts off apologizing to each other for wrongs perpetrated against each other 30 years in the past.
There’s one thing about our friendship that is a problem for me: My good  friend whom I’ve known since I was 6 is a RASOB: a Racist-Ass Son-Ofa-B****. The extent to which his racism is still in his heart was made clear to me during a recent phone conversation, in which he told me that the reason that he didn’t attend a car race that is usually an annual event for him, was that his buddy (whose RV they would have taken) had recently started dating a black woman, and she would be attending the event also.
I was so ticked off at hearing the reason for his not attending the race that I couldn’t speak for the rest of the conversation. My friend is rather talkative and took no notice of my silence.
Richard, I thank you for this post. It gives me the incentive and encouragement to bring up this matter again in my next conversation with my friend.

i shake my fist at you, sir, for always making me face these questions.

and then i give you a strong loving hug, for the same reason.

yes, this is painful. but it is so necessary to face….thank you for always encouraging me to face it.

How do I deal?
I keep speaking my mind, when necessary, or avoid the topics, when possible.

Do I keep loving/relationshipping?
You know my story. Where I’m at now, is recognizing that this is a 2-way street. I will do my best to keep loving and being in relationship, respecting differences yet speaking Truth with Grace. But I have to receive those in return, too, or it won’t work. My perspective has to be received with Grace and love, and Truth with Grace. We have to be able to have honest, open, loving dialogue where we both feel valued, not dismissed.

I have no clue where this road leads to next. All I know is that I have started the process of revealing my whole self, and that is super messy, but I had to do it. Not for the relationship sake, per se, but for the sake of my soul’s wholeness.

Do I compartmentalize?
I try to. But I dont recommend it and I dont think it is healthy. Because now, I am realizing that I put on different masks, or hide parts of me, with certain people. And that kills your soul.

Do I limit activism?
No. But only because I have friends who do agree with and support me, and who spur me on toward activism. Because I have to do what is Right.
(i might just not tell some people, though……)

…thank you…

That’s a great post. I may have to post that up on the front page.

Love the video. I’ve kept it in my reader for a while just to remember to keep listening to it.